Friends celebrate defying odds
Survivor (ser-vahy-ver) noun:
1. Somebody who survives: somebody who remains alive despite being exposed to life-threatening danger.
2. Somebody with great powers of endurance: somebody who shows a great will to live or a great determination to overcome difficulties and carry on.
Story by Carol Pappas
Photos by Jerry Martin
At first glance, you’d think it was simply a patio party in early fall, female friends gathering for wine and cheese and a little ‘girl talk.’
But on closer look, a touch of pink here, a dab of pink there and a plethora of pink just about everywhere, and you realize this is more than just a get-together for friends. It’s a coming together for a noble cause — a celebration of survival.
A half dozen or so of the women being celebrated fought the odds and won. They are survivors of breast cancer, and they — along with their friends — now celebrate each October with a Pink Fundraiser. It’s a chance to help others follow in their battle-worn footsteps and beat cancer.
It all began three years ago when Rebekah Hazelwood Riddle at Trendsetters Salon raised $1,000 in memory of her mother, Bella, who died of breast cancer when Rebekah was just 3 years old. Deanna Lawley invited friends and family of Kate DeGaris, who had just begun her battle with breast cancer, to have pink extensions applied to their hair in symbolic support of the project.
The next year, the group more than doubled the fundraising effort when Vicki Smith and Charlotte George expanded it to a wine and cheese reception at the home of Nelda Coupland. DeGaris’ longtime friends and her family worked to raise money for the American Cancer Society.
In 2012, a larger group returned to Coupland’s home for an even bigger event to recognize and honor a sisterhood of survivors, Cindy Goodgame, Virginia West, Sylvia Cornett, Kate DeGaris, Yvonne Bell and Annette Galloway Thomas.
Their stories share a common theme. It’s the tragic moment of a devastating diagnosis and an undying will to live.
Four years have passed since doctors told Kate DeGaris she had three to six months to live. She was in fourth-stage breast cancer that had spread to her arms, legs and spine. “It was a rough time, but I made up my mind I’m going to survive. I’m going to beat this,” she said. “I have good doctors. I have kids who are very supportive and friends who keep me pushing on.”
DeGaris credits her mother with setting the example she follows. She too, had breast cancer. She remembers telling her mother one day that she knew she had to be in a lot of pain. “She pointed her finger at me and said, ‘Nobody likes a complainer.’ ” Lesson learned. Lesson followed.
Just like her mother, she tries to keep a positive attitude. “I just keep going. I make myself,” she said.
It has been 14 years since Yvonne Bell heard the dreaded diagnosis: Breast cancer. Now, she is celebrating more than a decade as a survivor. The gathering of friends at the fundraiser “lets you know you are not alone in this. At some point in your lifetime, you will know someone with cancer.”
It was much the same in her own family. Her mother was a survivor. Her husband Jimmy beat the odds, too. At the Pink Fundraiser, she is surrounded by friends who know firsthand what rising above the challenge means. “It’s a little sisterhood — someone to talk to who knows exactly what you’re going through.”
Blair Goodgame hasn’t had breast cancer, but she was a central figure in the fundraiser to honor the ‘sisterhood’ that includes her mother, Cindy. She had a mastectomy when Blair was just an elementary school student.
Now a young woman who owns Lakeside Package in Pell City, she was a driving force behind the wine and cheese reception this year, working tirelessly to ensure that the celebration was just right, say party planners. Through her company, she furnished wine and attended to details of the event.
Of her mother’s own story of survival, Blair described her as a woman who is “as strong as they come” and inspires her involvement in the cause.
Lydia Pursell, DeGaris’ daughter, provided flowers, and she has been a source of great support for her mother.
There were others who added to the event to make it special, like Lakeside Coffee House and Princess Cupcakes; DeGaris’ brother, Earl Hodges; Renee Lilly of Lilly Designs; Winn-Dixie; Publix; and Julie Luker and Cindy Grimes, who added their own touch of pink to the occasion with pink hair streaks for all attendees.
And the extended sisterhood, the core group that made it all happen were Judy Ellison, Sylvia Cornett, Judi Denard, Beth Jones, Vicki Smith, Sally Vinson, Ginny West, Sylvia Martin, Charlotte George and Deanna Lawley.
It is through all of their efforts that this pink party is now a sanctioned event of the American Cancer Society, raising more money for breast cancer research and increasing the level of awareness with each passing year, according to the Cancer Society’s Malinda Williams, whose own mother is a two-time breast cancer survivor. Motioning toward the survivors at the reception, Williams said, “Y’all are the reason we’re standing here today.”
DeGaris acknowledged the sentiment. “It is good to have a family that’s real supportive, good friends and the man upstairs,” she said. “Every day I wake up, I’m thankful.”
